A Visitor’s Guide to Aberfeldy for Our New Friends From Texas: Yes, That Is the Whole Town, and No, You Can’t Ride the Highland Cattle

By our Visitor Economy Correspondent

With Aberfeldy set to twin with Salado in Texas, the town is preparing for the possibility of visitors from the Lone Star State. The Perthetic has put together a short guide for them.

Wade’s Bridge. Built in 1733 by General Wade, the bridge across the Tay is older than the United States. Please do not ask if it was “brought over from Europe”. It was built here. That’s the point.

The Birks of Aberfeldy. A beautiful woodland walk up to a waterfall, made famous by Robert Burns, who wrote a song about it. He did not write a country and western song about it, although we accept that “The Birks of Aberfeldy” would work quite well with a slide guitar.

The distillery. Aberfeldy has a whisky distillery. In Texas, you may be used to bourbon. Here, the main difference is that you add a drop of water, not ice, and that if you add Coke, a man in a tweed jacket will leave the room.

The weather. In Salado, it is often 35°C. In Aberfeldy, it is often not. Please bring a jacket. And another jacket. Shorts are allowed, but you will be stared at kindly, as if you are unwell.

Highland cattle. Yes, they are real. No, you can’t ride them. Yes, they have a fringe. No, nobody cuts it.

Most importantly, the people. Aberfeldy folk are friendly, warm and very keen to hear about Texas. They will ask you about the heat, the size of the steaks and whether you have met anybody famous. Then they will tell you about their cousin in Canada for about 45 minutes. This is normal. Smile and nod.

Welcome, y’all.

The real story: Aberfeldy twinning approved (The Courier)