I Have Had Enough of Storms Named After People I Would Like to Meet
Austen sounded bookish. Boelo sounded fun. Chloe sounds like she'll borrow my car.
The columnist, windswept. Photo: Henri Boutet, “Woman Walking in the Wind Holding an Umbrella MET DP876492”, via Wikimedia Commons, CC0
This newspaper’s columnist has a modest proposal: storms should be given names that warn you. Not ‘Chloe’. Something like ‘Storm Your Fence Is Going’ or ‘Storm Bring the Washing In, Margaret’.
I’m told storm names are chosen from public suggestions. I suggest ‘Storm Broxden’. It would circle Perth for hours, nobody would know which exit it’s taking, and it would eventually leave for Crieff for no reason.
Until then I shall be indoors with a teacake, judging the wind.
The real story: Fictional.
Letters to the Editor
The views expressed are those of the reader, and frankly that's on them.
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Storm Bring the Washing In Margaret is a perfect name. Margaret is my sister. She never does.
— Isa W., Methven, 26 October 2026 -
Storm Broxden would be the worst storm ever. It’d never leave.
— Craig H., Perth, 26 October 2026
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