“Scotland's Finest News Source, Allegedly”
English metro mayors get new powers to give residents money. Perth checks the cupboard and finds only a ceremonial chain.
Scottish councils urge ministers to think again. Perthshire is already arguing over 'Perthangus', 'Angusperth' and 'Kinrangus'.
Downing Street says no election is planned. Party volunteers in Perthshire are buying head torches anyway.
Multi-million recruitment drive for a northern power base. Perth offers a spare room above a Kinnoull Street bookies and a kettle.
After meeting the first ministers in Glasgow, Andy Burnham says nowhere will be left behind. Perthshire would like it in writing.
Scottish ministers and councils work out how to get the money to households. Perth homes form an orderly queue, with flasks.
Commons committee suggests wiping the slate clean. Letters from across Perthshire are already on their way to the Public Accounts Committee.
Former PM helps plan defence bank kept off the books. A Scone man now describes his overdraft as 'a strategic resilience facility'.
John Healey's budget aftershocks continue. Kinross pensioner gets out a highlighter. Accountants say the important bit is always the bit after 'before'.
Andy Burnham meets John Swinney and Rhun ap Iorwerth with proposals for the devolved governments. Perth draws up its own wishlist, mostly about the A9 and parking.
Lights out? Smells nice. Now in Power Cut, Granny's Hall Cupboard and Wet Dog By The Fire. Never leave a lit candle unattended, even a funny one.
Feeling a bit leany? Restores posture to stacks, steeples and uncles after weddings. Consult a qualified professional. Seriously. — Kinnoull Vitality Co.