Monday, 2 November 2026 · Perth, PerthshireToday: Rain, then some different rain · Est. whenever

“Scotland's Finest News Source, Allegedly”

Vol. CXII · No. 4,822Late Drizzle EditionPrice: One Tablet
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Local Characters

Perth’s Self-Appointed Umbrella Surgeon Opens Field Hospital at Bus Station

Fictional Ina Gall reattaches spokes 'with love and Sellotape'.

Umbrellas, in triage.

Umbrellas, in triage. Photo: AshokaJegroo, “Broken umbrella after Sandy”, via Wikimedia Commons, CC BY-SA 3.0

PERTH — Fictional Ina Gall, 68, has set up a folding table offering emergency repairs to inside-out umbrellas. Success rate: 3%. Morale: 100%.

“Most of them don’t make it,” she said. “But they go out knowing they were loved.”

The real story: Fictional.

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