Physicists Say the Universe May Be in ‘Cosmic Lockdown’; Council Asks to Be Consulted
A simplified model of a universe that won't move is welcomed in Perth as 'very relatable'.
The Hubble Ultra Deep Field, showing the universe, stuck. Photo: NASA and the European Space Agency., “Hubble ultra deep field”, via Wikimedia Commons, Public domain
PERTH — A study suggesting the universe may be held in a “cosmic lockdown” that stops it tunnelling into a different state has been warmly received in Perth, where officials said it was “nice to finally have some company.”
“For years people have told us we’re stuck,” said a council strategist. “Stuck in traffic, stuck with the same plans for a pool. Now scientists say the whole universe is stuck. That’s not a criticism. That’s a design philosophy.”
The researchers stress it is a simplified model that proves nothing about the real Higgs field. Residents took comfort anyway. “If the universe can’t change, nobody can blame us for the roadworks. It’s quantum mechanics.”
The council has asked to respond via a twelve-week consultation, which physicists say “will not be necessary”, and which the council says it “will be doing anyway.”
The real story: University of Portsmouth-led 'cosmic lockdown' study (ScienceAlert)
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