← Front Page
Good News
Tortoise Who ‘Went Missing’ Before Storm Was Under the Sofa the Whole Time
Family relieved; tortoise 'unbothered as ever'.

Gerald, unconcerned. Photo: Moise Nicu, “Tortoise portrait”, via Wikimedia Commons, CC BY 3.0
CRIEFF — A fictional Crieff family who feared their tortoise, Gerald, had been swept away by the weekend wind were delighted to find him under the sofa, eating a crisp.
“We’d put up posters,” said mum Fiona. “The posters blew away. But Gerald was there all along, judging us.”
Gerald, 54, declined to comment.
The real story: Fictional.
Letters to the Editor
The views expressed are those of the reader, and frankly that's on them.
No letters yet. The town is uncharacteristically quiet.
Write to the Editor