Parkrunners Record Personal Bests on Way Out, Personal Worsts on Way Back
Course described as 'downhill both ways, wind permitting'.
Runners, briefly airborne. Photo: Graham Hogg, “Runners on Pollok parkrun - geograph.org.uk - 5592607”, via Wikimedia Commons, CC BY-SA 2.0
PERTH — Runners on the North Inch on Saturday morning reported extraordinary times on the outward leg, as the westerly wind carried them along “like crisp packets”.
“I did the first 2km faster than Usain Bolt,” said fictional jogger Kirsty Moodie, 34. “The return took 40 minutes. I may have gone backwards for some of it.”
Organisers thanked volunteer marshals for standing in the wind “for no reason other than kindness”, which this newspaper considers the best kind.
The real story: Fictional.
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