Weather
Perth Weather Forecast Replaced With Single Word ‘Aye’ to Save Costs
Council says new system is '100% accurate, depending on tone of voice'.
“Scotland's Finest News Source, Allegedly”
Council says new system is '100% accurate, depending on tone of voice'.
Forecasters predict 'the kind of rain you don't notice until your socks know'.
Burn attends community drop-in session at Moncreiffe Halls, leaves damp patch on carpet and refuses to sign the comment form.

Lights out? Smells nice. Now in Power Cut, Granny's Hall Cupboard and Wet Dog By The Fire. Never leave a lit candle unattended, even a funny one.

Feeling a bit leany? Restores posture to stacks, steeples and uncles after weddings. Consult a qualified professional. Seriously. — Kinnoull Vitality Co.