Perth Weather Forecast Replaced With Single Word 'Aye' to Save Costs
Council says new system is '100% accurate, depending on tone of voice'.

The new Perth weather station, which is a man at a window.
PERTH — In a bid to cut costs, Perthshire's local weather forecast has been replaced with the single word "Aye", which officials insist conveys all necessary meteorological information "provided you're from here".
The change was brought in after a review found that 97% of Perth residents had stopped reading detailed forecasts years ago and simply looked out of the window, sighed, and said "aye".
"We realised we were spending a fortune on satellite data, barometric modelling and a man called Graham," said Head of Climatic Communications Isla Morrison. "And all of it could be summed up by one syllable. The beauty of 'aye' is its range. A short, flat 'aye' means drizzle. A long, rising 'aaaye' means heavy rain. An 'aye, well' means hail. And an 'aye, right' means sun, which nobody believes."
The new forecast will be delivered each morning on Radio Tay and on a large sign outside the council offices, which will be updated by someone looking up and making a judgement.
Residents have welcomed the clarity. "It's honestly the most accurate forecast we've ever had," said Letham resident Bill Kerr, 64. "Before, they'd say '60% chance of showers'. What does that even mean? Now it just says 'aye'. And it's always right. It's been 'aye' for six weeks."
Tourists have reported more difficulty. A visiting couple from Surrey said they asked a local whether it would rain on their walk up Kinnoull Hill and were told "aye", then asked whether it might clear up and were told "aye", and then asked whether they needed a coat and were told "och, aye".
"We still don't know what we were told," they said. "We got soaked, but also, oddly, we felt very welcome."
The Met Office is reportedly considering rolling out the system to the rest of Scotland, with Glasgow trialling "Aye" and Edinburgh trialling "Indeed".